Thawing Out..1..2..3 steps towards Home

Yesterday was the first day I did not draw or do something for AEDM. I went to bed at 8pm because I was so completely wiped out. I decided NOT to beat myself up over it..instead, congratulate myself for making it half way and think about all of the benefits from doing this challenge. And feed off of that energy to keep me going! Baby steps...it takes baby steps...

In my effort to meet other moms and friends for my 4 year old, we went to a Meetup at a park in a neigbhoring town today. It was so beautiful..there were horses and other farm animals there..All of the fall leaves were whirling in the sky...yellows and reds in their peak. There was a small pond. I watched the leaves floating on the water and travelling across, guided by the wind. I was reminded of the first day I started this blog..with the frozen coins locked under the ice. Today I identified with the leaves..moving slowly, quietly, peacefully..

Things are moving along here in my new environment and I am starting to meet some wonderful people. But I miss our community in Portland terribly..and today was one of those days where I took a step back for an overall reflection of where I was.

In the afternoon I took my daughter to the school playground near our apartment. She saw hopscotch there and was excited to jump it. As I watched her jumping, I thought more about "steps" and taking steps..instead of a "10" for the last step, the word "Home" was written on the pavement. I wondered how many steps it would take for me to reach a place that felt like home..how long it would take to feel completely at home with myself. And that is an even bigger challenge, one that I could not do without art being part of it.